Milly & Mr. Milly Guide, What Not To Do After a Breakup

So last week I was heading to Whole Foods when I spotted a young girl crying hysterically in front of the bank. I was about to approach her and ask her if she was OK .(I’ve learned never to ignore people when you see them in despair even if you don't know them.) But then I noticed she was crying into the phone. She was crying so loud and hysterically the whole block could hear her conversation. After hearing what she was saying, I felt so bad for her. I wanted to grab the phone and scream “NOOOOOOO.” This poor girl was begging this guy not to leave her. Her exact words to him were “Please don’t leave me, I love you, Please don’t leave me!” I felt so bad for this girl. How sad that she was begging a man to be with her. After I bought my groceries, I came home and immediately began inspired to write a post on things never to do after a breakup. Mr. Milly was home and he chimed in too. So here’s our list:

1)    Don’t ever call the person who dumped you-EVER! This is a huge mistake. Mr. Milly says if a man dumps you, best thing for you to do is never to call him again. You might think by calling him, he'll realize how much he needs or misses you. Mr. Milly says WRONG.Calling him will make him think you’re pathetic, and even worst- desperate and he will lose any left over respect he has for you. I know it’s hard, but just think of it like this, as soon  you call him, he’s thinking, "she's a loser." If you’re about to call him, call your best friend or close family member instead.

2)    If a man wants to leave you-help him pack his bags. Don’t ever beg anyone to stay with you. You’re too gifted, too beautiful, to beg anyone to be with you.  I know it’s hard, maybe you have children together, but don't do it. When you give someone that much power over your life, it's never a good thing, plus, you shouldn't have to beg anyone to want to be around you anyway. Mr. Milly says by not begging or going crazy over him, you're giving him a strong message that your life continues with or without him.

3)    Don’t social media stalk. That means no facebook stalking them to see who they have been talking to, no twitter or myspace (Do people still use this?). Nothing! If anything get them off your friends list. I know this is hard, but honestly what does looking through their facebook and twitter do but just make you more depressed and sad. It’s a bit of a self-torture Don’t do it.

4)    Don’t go right away into another relationship-After a break up you need time for you. Don’t right away think that getting into a relationship will do the trick to get over him. I don’t think this is always a good idea. Better to  spend time with yourself and your friends and realize what you want, then run right into the arms of another man who probably won't be Mr. Right because you're just looking for anyone to get over that first jerk.

5)    Stop reliving the relationship-Meaning if you guys had great time at Central Park-get the heck out of Central Park. Go to prospect Park. Don’t do things that remind you of this person because that will just lead you to feel more depressed and want to talk to this person. If you fell in love over watching The Notebook together, throw that Notebook DVD out the window. This may sound harsh, but this is what you have to do to get over the person.

6) STAY BUSY! Don't stay all day crying, and day dreaming and wondering what he is doing. Go outside, take a walk, hang out with your friends, go see a movie, go get your hair and nails done.  Go take a pole dance class or trapeze class. Do anything! KEEP BUSY.

7) Finally realize the relationship is over. It's done, and maybe you guys had a good time while it lasted, but this was just another person. The world is filled with people who will think you're amazing but remember in order to find true love, you must love yourself first.

Hope this helps. 

Hugs, 

Milly & Mr. Milly