Therapy Thursdays: "Life Lessons To Be a Happier You""

(update: Yesterday for some reason, both of my blog posts did not get updated with my writing corrections. I was mortified after I realized it hours later. It has been fixed now :-))

A few months back, I received an email with this question, "Dear Milly, do you ever get sad and when you do, what do you do to get over it. I'm in a depressed funk and can't get out of it. " I ended up emailing the young lady, but I wanted to share a few of my answers with you. Of course I get sad and depressed sometimes; I'm human. But I learned a long time ago, that in most cases, you have the power to control your mind and especially your happiness. So here are some lessons to be a happier person.


1) Focus on the positive-Here are two ways I can think about my life: "Aww man, seven years ago, I quit a great paying job in finance so I could pursue my dreams, and it still hasn't happened." or " Aww man, that audition went wrong, I must suck." Holy crap! I'm already sad just writing that. Time to change my thinking. Here's how I choose to think about my life: "Seven years ago, I quit my high paying job to follow my dreams.  No, my dreams haven't come true YET, but they WILL and while I'm waiting for them to come true, I am having a lot of fun a long the way." or "Yes that audition didn't go so well, but hey, this prepares me for the next one, which I will rock." When you choose to FOCUS on the positive out of every situation, believe you me, your whole outlook on everything changes for the better. I hear JLO is a huge believe in positive thinking and her life seems kind of awesome.  Click below to read more tips:

Therapy Thursday: Even When Things Aren't Going Great For You, Help Someone Else

Hey Loves, how's your day going. Want some coffee. I've got some Cafe Bustelo with your name on it.

Have a seat. Today I want to talk to you about helping others, when things aren't going so well for you and of course, I'll start with something that happened to me.
Last year, I found out about an opportunity to audition for my dream job. I was so excited! I knew I had it in the bag! So I went in feeling super confident, and after the audition,  in my mind, I thought I had done extremely well. But afterwards,  the casting director didn't seem too happy. I smiled at her, asked her how it went, and she immediately told me that I was good, but she wanted someone a little different than me. She began to describe what she wanted: someone taller, someone blonder, someone who knew Connecticut well, someone who had great contacts in Connecticut, etc etc.  After hearing this, I was super sad. I really thought I had this in the bag.

But as she mentioned everything she wanted, I started to think of my girlfriend, who was from the area, , who had more experience than me, who knew how to shoot/edit/write, produce, who had the look the casting agent wanted. And, although I was super sad because it didn't work for me, I immediately told her that since I wasn't the right fit, I would connect her to my girlfriend who I thought was perfect. Long story short, I called my girlfriend, she came in a few days later , and she got the job. I'd be lying to you girls if I told you, I wasn't sad. In fact, I was devastated. If you've been  reading my site for a while you know that I've been trying to report for years and this job was lifestyle reporting which was exactly what I wanted to do. However, after helping her, I noticed so many great things began happening. A few days later, I got an email from CVS asking if I'd be their spokesperson. I booked a few segments etc. As I've looked back on my life, I noticed a pattern, every time something is going bad for me, and I still chose to help someone, amazing things end up happening later. It's like the universe is thanking me. Not sure what it is, but today's Therapy Thursdays is this: when things are going bad for you, don't stop helping people. In fact, try to help someone else. I really believe you'll see a reward later.

Hugs,


Milly

Are you following your Dreams? Part 2

I might do a beauty post later on today but right now I'm so inspired and I had to share. Yesterday my mentor in my head Loren Ridinger posted her dream board. If you don't know who Loren is read the entrepemom column I did with her here. If you don't feel like reading, Loren and her husband founded a multi gazillion dollar company called Market America. Anyway,  you can click to see it her dream or vision board here.  Her post inspired me because she talks about how the stuff on her dream board have pretty much all come true.

Her post got me thinking to my own vision board. I'll be honest life has been so crazy that I really haven't looked at it in a while. So I took it out yesterday and realized that I could remove three things from it because they'd come true already. Here's an example of one: Last year  a new building opened in my neighborhood. I would walk by this building everyday and just stare at it. I was so dying to live there, but I was still locked into my lease  for  another year and a half. I put the pic of the new building on my vision board, sent my request up to the heavens,  and went on my way thinking hard everyday about that building. Almost immediately, I began having problems in my old apartment. My ceilings started to leak repeatedly. I got locked into my bathroom a whole day because of a faulty lock,  and then one day, I was about to take a shower, when I turned on the tub, and black water began oozing out of the faucet. It was sewage. (I have the pics if anyone wants to see.)  The owner immediately released us from our lease, gave us two months rent back because he was so scared we'd sue the pants off of him, and I was able to move into the new building.  I'm not sure if this is due to the power of the vision board, but I find it so strange that after living in that building for three years, never having a problem in the building, right when I  wanted to leave, things began immediately happening to make me go.

 The board reminds you that you can accomplish anything, and if you want it to happen bad enough, the universe or God (whatever you believe) will help you achieve it. I also believe that being kind and good to others has a lot to do with your overall success. Stepping on people's toes to reach to the top will only bring bad karma your way so learn to love others and feel happy for their success and accomplishments. There is plenty of room in this world for everyone to succeed.

Bottom line, remember you can do whatever you put your mind to! If you really want something, you can make it happen through hard work, dreams and belief. If someone tells you otherwise, don't listen. They probably didn't make their dreams come true, and want you to think you can't make yours come true either.  Realize that your potential is limitless. You are destined for greatness...but only if you believe you are.

For Part 1 of are you following your dreams, click here. 

Hugs,

Milly

Apologies Again

Hey loves,
Feels like I'm always saying sorry.
Sorry I haven't posted the last two days.
On Sunday, my hubby was in a car accident.
He escaped pretty ok although the cab he was in, was completely destroyed, but for an hour, I had no idea if he was dead or alive or what hospital he was in.
The accident happened in another state.
Words can't describe how I felt, especially since we had had an argument the last time we had spoken.
So of course, I learned a valuable lesson, that I will be sharing with you in my life advice soon.


Hugs,

Murad Winner & Life Advice- Karma is Real People

 Winner of Murad is comment #15. Latonya. If I don't hear back from you by Sunday, we'll have to give this to someone else.

Today no beauty advice, but stick around, grab some tea or coffee and come read some of my life advice. It's a story that happened to me. You know I love sharing those.

One night almost ten years ago,  it was around 7:30. I was heading home from school super late because I'd been hanging with my friends.  I had my discman on (there were no ipods back then) when all of a sudden, I felt a force push me to the floor. What the heck! I looked up to see  two girls who I'd recognized from my neighborhood, pummeling me with their fist. I didn't even know these girls.   I'm sooooooooooooo not a fighter. But, I tried to defend myself the best I could, and knowing I couldn't win against two, I did my best to just block their attack. A few moments later, a man stepped in and stopped the fight/beating (whatever you want to call it). Although by then, a huge crowd had gathered to watch.  My hair was a mess, my nose was bloody, and I had marks all over me. An older woman wiped me off, and all I could do was stare at the girls as they ran laughing and looking back at me. At the time I didn't want to worry my mom so I decided against telling her, and went to my best friend's house who lived upstairs from me and cleaned myself off before I went home. Since I'm never the type to stress things, because even back then I knew how the universe worked, I went on with my life, and rarely thought about the incident. I saw the girls from time to time and they would laugh at me and talk about how they beat me up, but I always kept walking/running. lol

Fast forward almost 10 years later, and two weeks ago. I was in a Starbucks in Midtown Manhattan. There was a huge line, but for some reason when I met eyes with the cashier, she looked extremely uncomfortable. She began fidgeting. She asked another girl to take over the register while she went to the back but the other girl refused At first I wondered why she was acting like that. I hadn't thought about that incident in years so I had no idea who she was, but as I stared at her, it was clear my presence was making her more and more uncomfortable.  All of a sudden it hit me! It was her! One of the girls who had attacked me years ago. I was in shock and remembering that day got me really upset. But,  let's just say life had not been kind to her. (Which is usually how life is for bad people.) I began to laugh out loud to myself. (A few people started looking  at me as if I was crazy so I stopped.) As the line got shorter, I thought about all the mean things I would say to her, and how I would  complain to the manager about her horrid service. But when I got to her and she took my order, I can honestly say I really felt bad for her. She didn't look great at all. She looked way older than her years. Her skin looked bad and dehydrated. Her hair was already graying.  From the looks of it, her life had not been great. She couldn't even look me in the eye as she took my order and she even dropped my credit card when she swiped it. After watching her,  I decided rather than stoop to her level, I would take the high road. So I smiled at her, and said "Wow, I haven't seen you in years," ordered my latte, and stepped to the side. She looked at me in shock. And as I waited for them to call my name for my drink, I kept catching her stare at me. After I got my drink, I walked out, but before I left, I turned around, and again spotted her staring after me but this time she gave me a slight smile. Not in a mean way, but almost as if to say,  "I'm sorry." or "Thanks for not embarrassing me." 

This incident got me thinking about Karma After attacking me 10 years later, this woman had to serve me a drink and not only that, my presence made her extremely uncomfortable and she looked really bad. Remember in life, anything you do to someone whether good or bad, will come back to you in some way or another. And if someone does something bad to you, don't stress it. Know that  Karma is real and life will pay them back.

Do you believe in Karma?

With that being said-

Have a good weekend.

Next week, we're showcasing a lot of spring releases so be ready.
Also Cassie is reviewing a hair salon.

Hugs ,

Milly


PS that pic is from www.degreesofemotion.com